4 Questions Every Leader Will Eventually Ask Themselves
In my nearly 40 years of experience in leading people from various cultures and backgrounds, I have seen many succeed, and sadly, I have seen just as many fail. All this to say, it is my conclusion that effective leadership is not something that just happens. It is something you have to work at, and work hard at, for that matter. For those who have been in a leadership position for a long time, you know what I mean. I have learned that effective leadership takes intentionality, continual learning, listening and even more important, a good deal of introspection. For those who have stayed the course and remained effective in their roles of authority, they likely have asked themselves, at one time or another, four fundamental questions that have helped them sustain the rigors of leadership.
I share these questions with you now with the hope that you will reflect on them, taking time to deeply ponder them and answer them truthfully as they apply to your life. I am confident these questions will serve you again and again, helping you to understand the truest definition of effective leadership.
MY IDENTITY – WHO AM I APART FROM MY TITLES?
We are each born with a certain set of gifts and propensity towards certain characteristics, such as risk and change tolerance, optimism and pessimism, etc. We also have a unique set of experiences in life that have shaped us. I love the quote attributed to Oscar Wilde, “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken”. You are uniquely you, not your titles, your education, nor even just your personality style. Step away from those societal and sometimes, self-imposed descriptions, and instead, reflect on who you are underneath them all. You might be surprised who you discover. (See post on identity)
MY PURPOSE – YEARS FROM NOW, WILL I LOOK BACK WITH APPRECIATION OF HOW I’M SPENDING MY TIME TODAY?
I cannot begin to tell you the number of times people have asked me to help them understand their purpose in life and the corollary to that, how do I know God’s will for my life. Understanding your purpose in life is a process that starts by developing a deeper sense of self-awareness. As a Christian, I have looked consistently to the passage in Romans12:2, “Do not conform to the patterns of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is- his good, pleasing and perfect will. To what extent are you clear in your purpose? That will determine the extent to which you tend to feel fulfilled in life” (NIV).
I love being on this journey of living out God’s purposes in my life and fully enjoy helping others in understanding that journey for them as well.
SUCCESS – WHAT IS SUCCESS… FOR ME?
Success. Everyone wants it, but so few understand it. Let’s face it, success is a loaded word! A simple definition of success is the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. So, that takes us back to purpose. Understanding your purpose and increasingly living it out, is what lands you success. We’ve all experienced success in certain areas of life only to look back and wonder if the cost to gain that success was worth it. Is what you’re currently good at, winning at, or triumphing in, worth the loss you are experiencing in other areas of your life? Remember, that which provides gain in the short term but harm in the long term, should never be called success.
THRIVING – WHAT WOULD IT LOOK LIKE TO THRIVE IN ALL AREAS OF MY LIFE? WHAT WOULD IT TAKE?
We are meant to be more than just leaders in organizations, non-profits, for-profits, public and private sectors. We are meant to be parents, children, friends, family members, community activists, mentors, visionaries and so much more. But oftentimes, we find ourselves directing most of our time, energy, and devotion to just one aspect of our life, ultimately, depleting the full purpose of our lives. This is why thriving at life has been my life’s journey, and now I want to help others “thrive at life,” too, as if it is the norm, and not the exception. So, what does it take to reach this realization and move forward on this journey? It’s going to take a greater self-awareness, intentionality, perseverance, and support. No one just “arrives” at it in one day. It is a passage that is different for all of us. And while it’s not complicated, it is challenging, but definitely worth it for all those who want effective leadership, but not at the cost of their true identity and purpose in life.
If you have asked yourself these four questions, and want to go to the next level, we can and want to help. As a former senior executive and now Co-founder/CEO at Ripple Effects, I am committed to developing a tailored and customized plan to help you, a leader and so much more, gain knowledge and understanding of your particular situation so you can build towards a life that is fulfilling and sustainable.
